For the Person He Loves
by Evvy
Summary: If you enjoy Snape's makovers, don't read. I'm depriving him of his usual attributes: greasy hair and yellow teeth. And I hate his new look.


TITLE: For the Person He Loves

AUTHOR'S NAME: Ev vy

AUTHOR'S EMAIL: I like when you write to me!

SUMMARY: Do you enjoy Snape's makeovers? If so, don't read. He's supposed to be a greasy-haired, yellow-teethed and sallow-skinned Potions Master and I'm depriving him of those attributes. Why? Because he's in love, obviously.

DISCLAIMER #1: I don't own any of them, they belong to the Mighty JKR

DISCLAIMER #2: There's one direct quotation from "Michael Collins" movie (because I like Alan Rickman) and one indirect form "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" (because I like Douglas Adams) and I definitely don't own them. If there are other quotations, I used them unintentionally and I don't own them either.

AUTHOR'S NOTE #1: * * mark the implied reader's thoughts

AUTHOR'S NOTE #2: This fic alludes to another one and I'm sure some of you will recognize it. No offence meant.

**~*~**

**For the Person He Loves**

Professor Severus Snape, the Potions Master at Hogwarts felt strange. This was the first time he felt like this. His steps were lighter than usual, his mood not as sour as usual and his soul not as burdened *as usual*. He mused for a short while if it had been her smile that had changed his feelings and overall attitude. *Oh no, another "Snape in love" fic, hope it's not Mary Sue this time* And he came to the conclusion that it had indeed been so. Suddenly, he felt like having one of the megaliths of Stonehenge on his shoulders. Why did she smile at him? She must have been pitying him. She knew very well that nobody liked him and smiled only to comfort him. *Poor Sevvy, how can they do it to him?*

His steps lost their lightness and his usual mood returned. He had to do something to deserve another, this time sincere smile. He reached his quarters and slumped into his favorite armchair by the fireplace. Quite contrarily to the potions classroom, his quarters were very cozy, well-furnished and the fire was constantly roaring in the fireplace. *Oh, Sevvy does have a human side after all.* He got up and went to the bathroom, to change he needed to begin with his outside, then he could proceed to his inside. He wasn't sure which would be easier, but he had to begin with something. *NO! Another makeover!! Help!!* He hesitated for a moment and looked in the mirror.

MIRROR: Arrrrggghhhh!!!

SNAPE: Arrrrggghhhh!!!

MIRROR _voice shaking slightly_: Oh dear, you really do look awful, no doubt about that! Why haven't you showed up for so long?

SNAPE _sneering_: Take a guess.

MIRROR: You should do something about that, you know. I'm surprised that people don't get heart attack when they see you.

SNAPE: They got used to me.

The mirror mumbled something disbelievingly. Snape's eyes shot daggers at the mirror, but he had to admit that it was right.

SNAPE: Do you think that something can be done?

MIRROR: Hmm, dunno. You have to try really hard, dear. But remember, you'll never look like, let's say, Alan Rickman.

SNAPE: _WHO?_ *No, he doesn't know who Alan Rickman is!!!*

MIRROR: Never mind. Get to work!

Snape began to rummage through the shelves in the bathroom, throwing behind him one bottle after another.

SNAPE: "Extra Liquid Soap 4 Those Who Can't Make Their Own", I can, dammit. What's this doing here? Never mind. And this? "Deliciously Delicate Shampoo 4 Those Who Care For Their Hair Every Day". Definitely not for me, I need something much stronger.

MIRROR: Much, much, much stronger.

SNAPE: Aah, shut up! Hmm, and what's this? "B Squeaky Clean"? Hmm, I could use that. And this? Lemme see. "You'll B Delighted: Scented Soap 4 Real Men." Nah, not for me, hate scented soap. And this? "Neglected Your Hair? Best Solution 4 U!". Now that's sounds good.

Snape hadn't washed his hair for a very long time, and he didn't actually remember when he stopped caring for his hygiene. *Yuck! That's really disgusting and I held this guy for a sex symbol. I'm so stoopid.* He showered from time to time, used some mouthwash, but nothing more. He mused for a while about the possible coordinates of his toothbrush, he was sure that had seen it somewhere. But where?

SNAPE: Oi! Mirror, mirror on the wall, have you seen my toothbrush?

MIRROR: Wha? Have you ever had a toothbrush, dear?

SNAPE _clenching his teeth_: Never mind.

He tried to recall where he might have seen his toothbrush. He really didn't want to go to Hogsmeade to buy a new one. He could easily imagine the smirk on a shopkeeper's face. So he had to find his old one, it hadn't been used by him too much so it would do for some time now. And at least he was able to make his own toothpaste, or rather something alike. But this damn toothbrush! He looked under the bathtub, it seemed that there were quite a lot of things underneath.

SNAPE: _Lumos_!

MIRROR: Just don't be surprised by what you find there!

SNAPE: I told you to shut up! And what is this? It looks like a comb I got from Minerva for Christmas...

MIRROR: Million years ago...

SNAPE _getting red in the face_: SHUT UP! It broke down right away.

MIRROR: It wasn't that surprising, you tried to use it for _your hair_.

SNAPE _gritting his teeth_: Grrhhh. And what is that?

MIRROR: Looks like a cutthroat razor.

SNAPE: I know, but what is it doing here? I have never used anything like this!

MIRROR: Well...

SNAPE: You know something, don't you?

MIRROR: Once, when you came back from Hogsmeade, you were so drunk that you tried to shave your face using a knife. To impress the person you were with. But this person shaved your legs with the razor instead.

SNAPE _blushing_: Who was that person?

MIRROR: Hmm, I don't know if I should tell you. But don't worry you shaved this person's legs too.

SNAPE: Who was it? *Yeah! Who was it? Urrgh, mutual shaving, does this count as fetishism?*

MIRROR: You won't be pleased to hear this, but it was Remus Lupin.

SNAPE: What? Me and Lupin shaving legs? *Uff, at least it was Lupin, I was afraid it might have been McGonagall. Her Animagus is a cat, so she could be having hairy legs... and hairy chest. Help!*

MIRROR: Yes, dear.

SNAPE: Never mind. There's my toothbrush! Yay! Now I have to prepare a toothpaste.

Snape went to his private lab and began to prepare necessary ingredients, some mint, soda... And what else did he need? He was proud of his memory for potions' compositions but as he hadn't used the teeth-cleaning recipe in the last fifteen years, he had simply forgotten. No problem. He just had to improvise. When the toothpaste was ready, he went back to the bathroom and cleaned his teeth thoroughly. He looked into the mirror to check how they looked.

MIRROR: Arrrrgggh!

SNAPE: Arrrrgggh!

MIRROR: I'm blind!

SNAPE: I'm blind!

MIRROR: Don't open your mouth so wide when you're talking! You could light up the whole Hogsmeade.

SNAPE: OK. I'll turn away from you. But I have to do something, I can't talk with my lips over my teeth all the time.

MIRROR: You already do talk like this, but the reason's been different.

SNAPE: Hmm, you're right. Still, I have to do something. What if I incidentally look in a mirror? But I'll think about it later. Now, let's do something with my hair.

MIRROR _chuckling_: Don't look at me. I won't help you.

Snape's eyes narrowed dangerously. But he didn't retort to the mirror's last statement. Instead he took "Neglected Your Hair? Best Solution 4 U!" shampoo and poured it generously over his hair. He washed them carefully, rinsed the shampoo off and dried the hair with a drying spell.

SNAPE: So what do you think? *He still does look like his old self. Well, apart from the teeth. Oi! Snape! Don't change!*

MIRROR: Not bad, dear. Were I you, I'd do it at least two more times.

SNAPE: You're right! *No it's not right! Snape, please, don't*

Snape followed the mirror's advice. *He can't ignore me like that!* He washed his hair twice, but this time wasn't as careful and had to have his eyes shut tight. When he finally rinsed the last remains of the shampoo off his head and dried his hair, he opened his eyes and looked into the mirror.

MIRROR: OOPS! *OOPS*

SNAPE: Yyyyy...

MIRROR _laughing loud_: Oh, S-Sevvy. T-this i-is h-horrible.

SNAPE: I'm half-bald!

MIRROR _chuckling_: Oh, you have overdone it a little bit.

SNAPE: @!#*#@!!@#@##!@!!##@!@@#@#!##@@!!

MIRROR: That's no excuse for obscenities! *Yeah! You don't have too be rude! It's your own fault.*

SNAPE: I just have to do what I should have done right away.

He shaved all his hair off, with the cutthroat razor. The mirror snorted but didn't comment. *He looks even worse!* And he began to look through the stacks of books he had in his quarters. Finally he found what he needed. The title read: "DON"T PANIC! The Wizard's Guide to Unexpected and Unusual Situations." He leafed through the book and found hair-growing spell. He performed it and went back to the bathroom.

MIRROR: Now, that looks good. *Yeah! A little tan and our dear Potions Master will appear on the cover of Vanity Fair!*

SNAPE _one eyebrow arching in the way Sean Connery arches his eyebrow_ *Mmmmmm*: Hmm, yeah!

MIRROR: Just don't bump into Rita Skeeter, she'd love to see you on the cover of "The Daily Prophet." But you could always blind her with your improved teeth set and run away.

SNAPE: Are you trying to be funny?

MIRROR _innocently_: Nah, I wouldn't dare. But tell me, who's the lucky person? *Unlucky, you mean... I want my old Snape! However...*

Snape looked again in the mirror and had to admit that he wasn't looking bad at all. He only needed some fresh air and a little sunshine to do away with the sallowness of his skin. But she was definitely worth it. He never cared what other people thought of him, so he didn't care what they would think now. He could always blind them with his teeth. He just hoped that she would like his new look. He had done all this for her, for the woman who had predicted his death so many times. Oh Sybill, he sighed. *THUD! A/N: The implied reader fainted.*

**~*~**


End file.
